"I want to make sure everybody who has a job wants a job"
--George Bush, during his first Presidential campaign

"This is a great day for France!"
--Richard Nixon, while attending Charles De Gaulle's funeral

"Now, like, I'm President. It would be pretty hard for some drug guy to come into the White House and start offering it up, you know? I bet if they did, I hope I would say, 'Hey, get lost. We don't want any of that.'"
--George Bush, talking about drug abuse to a group of students

"For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex . . . uh . . . setbacks."
--George Bush

"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy. But that could change."
--Dan Quayle

"Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here."
--Dan Quayle during a visit to Hawaii in 1989

"What a waste it is to lose one's mind--or not to have a mind. How true that is."
--Dan Quayle addressing the United Negro College Fund

"I am honored today to begin my first term as the Governor of Baltimore-that is Maryland."
--William Donald Schaefer, first inaugural address

"The caribou love it. They rub against it and they have babies. There are more caribou in Alaska than you can shake a stick at."
--George Bush, on the Alaska pipeline

"I hope I stand for anti-bigotry, anti-Semitism, anti-racism. This is what drives me."
--George Bush

"If I listened to Michael Dukakis long enough I would be convinced that we're in an economic downturn and people are homeless and going without food and medical attention and that we've got to do something about the unemployed."
--Ronald Reagan

"My fellow Americans, I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."
--Ronald Reagan, about to go on the air for a radio broadcast, unaware that the microphone was already on

"Mars is essentially in the same orbit. Mars is somewhat the same distance from the sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."
--Dan Quayle

"Now we are trying to get unemployment to go up and I think we're going to succeed."
--Ronald Reagan

And Great Moments in Political Debates:

Walter Mondale: George Bush doesn't have the manhood to apologize.

Bush: Well, on the manhood thing, I'll put mine up against his any time.

"I am a jelly doughnut"
--English translation of John F. Kennedy speaking at the Berlin Wall

"I'm not against the blacks and a lot of the good blacks will attest to that."
--Evan Mecham, then governor of Arizona

"Nixon has been sitting in the White House while George McGovern has been exposing himself to the people of the United States."
--Frank Licht, then governor of Rhode Island, campaigning for McGovern in 1972

"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history . . . this century's history. We all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century."
--Dan Quayle

The word is not covert, it's overt. Covert means you're out in the open. Overt is what I did. [Which means] I was under cover.
--Chic Hecht, Nevada senator, talking about his 18 years of participation in covert operations as an army intellegence officer

I did what any normal person would do at that age. You call home. You call home to mother and father and say, "I'd like to get into the National Guard."
--Dan Quayle

I can't believe that we are going to let a majority of the people decide what's best for this state.
--Representative John Travis, member of the Louisiana Legislature from Jackson, opposing legislation that was popular with voters

I don't need bodyguards.
--Jimmy Hoffa, labor leader

I am speaking of a great man who should have been President and would have been one of the greatest Presidents in history -- Hubert Horatio Hornblower.
--Jimmy Carter, in a speech at the 1980 Democratic Convention

I guess I would have voted with the majority if it was a close vote. But I agree with the arguments the minority made.
--President Bill Clinton, on the 1991 Gulf War resolution

Don't let a lack of qualifications stop you from pursuing your career goals. I was never qualified for any of the positions I achieved.
--U.S. Representative Sonny Bono

There's no textbook on judgment. I might make one or two other [mistakes], but it will certainly be with great forethought.
--Marion Barry, mayor of Washington, D.C.

The global importance of the Middle East is that it keeps the Far East and the Near East from encroaching on each other.
--Dan Quayle

It isn't pollution that's harming our environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.
--Dan Quayle

The following were submitted by Rene Schweitzer.

Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC

"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."
--Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents

The police are not here to create disorder. They're here to preserve disorder."
--Former Chicago mayor Daley during the infamous 1968 Democratic Party convention

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese.
--Former French President Charles de Gaulle

I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.
--David Dinkins, New York City Mayor, answering accusations that he failed to pay his taxes.

The Internet is a great way to get on the Net.
--Republican presidential candidate Bob Dole

Things are more like they are now than they ever were before.
--Former U.S. President Dwight D. Eisenhower

Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.
--Former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery

It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.
--Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle

I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people.
--Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle

The streets are safe in Philadelphia. It's only the people who make them unsafe.
--Frank Rizzo, ex-police chief and mayor of Philadelphia

The president has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
--Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on "Larry King Live"
(How true - The Tamster)

That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it.
--A congressional candidate in Texas

Without censorship, things can get terribly confused in the public mind.
--General William Westmoreland, during the war in Viet Nam.

I think that's self-evident, but not true
-- President Bill Clinton, on criticism that he made conservative speeched but governed as a liberal.

And let me say in conclusion, thanks for the kids. I learned an awful lot about bathtub toys - about how work the telephone. One guy knows - several of them know their own phone numbers - preparation to go to the dentist. A lot of things I'd forgotton. So it's been a good day.
-- former president George Bush, during a Maryland Head Start Center visit

Some of our friends are for it. Some of our friends are against it. And we're standing with our friends.
-- Mike McCurry, White House press secretary, discussing whether or not President Clinton would veto a bill curbing securities lawsuits.

You hear about constitutional rights, free speech, and the free press. Every time I hear these words I say to myself, "That man is a Red, that man is a Communist!" You never hear a real American talk like that.
-- Mayor Frank Hague, Jersey City, New Jersey, 1938.

We have nothing against ideas. We're against people spreading them.
-- General Augusto Pinochet of Chile.

And I guess with these cameras listening, be sure never to end your sentance with a -- without -- end a sentance with a prepostion because it will be duly reported all across the country by these guardians of the . . .
-- President George Bush at a White House meeting with Close-Up Foundations Students.

I was confused. I was not aware that making up a story and lying to the police is against the law.
-- Goran Rasmussen, Swedish tourist in Thailand, who bought $3,000 worth of fake U.S. dollars on the black market, then told the police he had been swindled by a currency dealer.

He doesn't say I directly told him anything. He says that, you know, the fact that I expressed concern had an impact on him. [But] the mere expression of concern could be, I guess, taken to mean something more than it was meant.
-- Hillary Clinton in denying the claims of her former aide that she requested the firing of the White House office staff to replace them with her Arkansas cronies.

The interests of the employers and the employed are the same nine times out of ten -- I will even say ninety-nine times out of ten.
-- Lord Curzon, British statesman and viceroy of India from 1898 to 1905, Oxford University chancellor, foreign secretary from 1919 to 1924.

There are a lot of things that we do that are irrelevant, but that's what the Senate is for.
-- Senator Alan Simpson (R - Wyoming), while on the MacNeil/Lehrer NewsHour.

Mario Cuomo (when asked about the possibility of President Clinton offering him a spot on the Supreme Court): If an offer were made, I would answer the question so swiftly that every one of you in the media, and especially talk-show hosts, would write, "This, surely, is the most decisive man in America."
Reporter: Would you accept the offer?
Cuomo: I don't know what the answer would be.

I have lied in good faith.
-- Bernard Tapie, French politician accused of fixing a soccar match involving the team he owned, when his sworn alibi fell apart in court.

I made no attempt to be inaccurate, but I want to be clear I was not attempting to be precise.
-- Josh Steiner, Treasury Chief of Staff, explaining his diary before a Whitewater hearing.

Our party has been accused of fooling the public by calling tax increases "revenue enhancement." Not so. No one was fooled.
-- Former Vice President Dan Quayle.

The more we remove penalties for being a bum, the more bumism is going to blossom.
-- Senator Jesse Helms commenting against welfare.

I have made good judgements in the past. I have made good judgements in the future.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle in a May 1989 Los Angeles Times interview.

The best thing about rain forests is that they never suffer from any drought.
-- Former Vice President Dan Quayle.

You might say I was there to make sure all the i's were crossed and the t's were dotted.
-- John Dean, former White House legal advisor, during the Watergate hearings.

I'm not going to come out with programs that will defeat me, no matter how I stand on that program, because I want to get elected. There may be some programs that you believe in and I believe in that will not be campaign issues, because if they are, I won't be governor.
-- R.B. Jordan III, Lieutenant Governor, campaigning for the Democratic nomination for Governor of North Carolina, as reported in the Raleigh News and Observer.

I wouldn't want anything to happen to the president of the United States, even though I might be in some kind of line of succession. It probably will never happen anyway, but it's nice to think about anyway.
-- Senator Warren Magnuson, upon becoming President Pro Tem of the Senate.

I do not like this word "bomb." It is not a bomb. It is a device that is exploding.
-- French Ambassador to New Zealand Jacques le Blanc, regarding press coverage of France's nuclear weapons tests in the Pacific.

If what I understand, if it is true, that I was told what I understand, yes, I thought that made sense.
-- President Ronald Reagan, on the terms for releasing Iran hostages in 1981.

We know it's not good for kids. But a lot of things aren't good. Drinking's not good. Some would say milk's not good.
-- Bob Dole, during the 1996 presidential campaign.

Don't forget to put the 'e' on the end of 'potatoe'.
-- Dan Quayle talking to a bunch of little kids.
Submitted by Ange5150.

Al Gore gave a big speech this week about how his faith is so "important" to him. In this attempt to convince the American people that we should consider him for president, he announced that his favorite Bible verse is John 16:3. Of course the speech writer meant John 3:16, but nobody in the Gore camp was familiar enough with scripture to catch the error. And do you know what John 16:3 says?

John 16:3 - "And they will do this because they have not known the Father nor Me"

Submitted by Shawn Rung.

No man is an Ireland.
-- Chicago Mayor Richard Daley

I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix.
-- Vice President Dan Quayle

Politics gives guys so much power that they tend to behave badly around women. And I hope I never get into that.
-- Rhodes Scholar Bill Clinton

The Internet is a great way to get on the Net.
-- Presidential candidate Bob Dole

Not a screw up, but a very apt observation.

Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
-- Ronald Reagan

Know any more Political Slip-Ups?
Email me and I'll add them to the list