The Minnesotan's guide to computer terminology

LOG ON:

making da vood stove hotter

LOG OFF:

don't add vood

MONITOR:

keep an eye on da vood stove

MEGAHERTZ:

vhen a big log drops on your barefoot in da mornin

FLOPPY DISK:

vhat you get from piling too much vood

RAM:

da hydraulic thing dat makes da voodsplitter vork

HARD DRIVE:

getting home during most of da vinter

PROMPT:

vhat ya vish da mail vas during da snow season

ENTER:

come on in

WINDOWS:

vhat ya shut vhen it gets 10 degrees below 0

SCREEN:

vhat is a must during mosquito season

CHIP:

vhat ya munch during da Vikings games

MICROCHIP:

vhat's left in da bag vhen da chips are gone

MODEM:

vhat ya did to da hay fields last Yuly

DOT MATRIX:

Sven Matrix's vife

LAPTOP:

vhere da grandkids sit

KEYBOARD:

vhere ya suppose to put da keys so da Misses can find em

SOFTWARE:

da plastic picnic utensils, ya?

MOUSE:

vhat leaves dem little turds in da cupboard

MAINFRAME:

da part of da sauna that holds up da roof

PORT:

vhere da commercial fishin boats dock

RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY:

vhen ya can't remember how much ya spent on da new deer rifle vhen da vife asks about it

From Rene.