The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear heavy breathing again. 

 

    I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there. 

 

   I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

 

    I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

 

    I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.



    The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.



    If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.



And last but not least:    I don't exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.



    You could run this over to your friends but why not just e-mail it to them!