Intimacy

~Intimacy. Most times this term is thought of as a sharing of what are termed "emotionally charged" experiences. This is not to say this IS the definition of intimacy but it is the aspect with which you are most familiar. When one is uncomfortable, or fearful, of re-visiting these experiences within themselves, it would be most uncommon to re-visit them within sharing with another individual. At times, and within certain encounters, this fearfulness will feel a brief alleviation and in these times an opening shall be made where a limited exchange can take place. At other times, and within the same type of encounters, the fearfulness shall be temporarily alleviated in another type of expression; that of the knowing it is temporary. It can feel quite safe for an individual to allow this opening for a limited time and in a limited capacity. The idea of permanently allowing this opening is still fearful and the idea that this opening shall continuously extend wider and wider can seem emotionally paralyzing.

~Although energy can be lent in helpfulness from others, the initial choice, if intimacy is truly desired, must first come from within and an eagerness to experience this with self. As one becomes more intimate with self and fearfulness is loosened, the very definition of intimacy alters. It becomes not only sharing of "emotionally charged" experiences, but the sharing of one's honest perception of all their experiences. But first one must be willing to share their honest perception with themselves.

~Sporadic encounters of limited time frame offer the ability to share within partial intimacy and also provide you the means to "escape" when a level of allowance has been reached.

~Although this issue can be misinterpreted as a lack of self worth, the lack of self worth is what prevents intimacy with self. As a relationship with self is addressed and one allows self intimacy, so one feels more free to share with others. One cannot show people who they truly are if one is afraid to even show themselves. You ARE, and by that very design hold worth. As one allows them self intimacy with self so they shall allow them self intimacy in a sustaining relationship.